Something I wished for my mother in law | lunnas's Blog

 I wished my mother in law and me and my husband

 could set down and her and all of us talk about the things

we all did while we lived with her talking about things she did

to us things i did back to get back at her ,things iwould like to tell her

iam sorry for that i did to her i would love to talk to her heart to heart

about the things she did that hurt me and my family ,

i would like to get her forgiveness and us start over with

our relationship . but to go over to her house every week and

act as nothing happend in her mind she opend us her house

to us , a little distorted the way she sees it 

 but every time we go over to her house

she acts like nothing happend that she was''mother treasa''

 the woman of such kindness and such selfless giving

but i know shes just the opsite . last night she asked me

to join a womens spa to work out with her

not gona happen i just can give her that relationship she wants

becalse i have such inresavled  resentment of how shes treated us

i would like for all that to be worked out but guess shes not got it

in her to say shes sorry and just to talk about all the issuess.

 when she was asking me to go to the spa and work out with her

as her guest i asked her wont her daughter like to work out

with her something specail for mother and daughter?

she said her daughters so interverted to go work out.

donald replyed oh sis would have to ware pants .see her religin

she wont ware pants guess its a sin or something .

i had to bite the side of my lip to keep from adding to it what he said.

oh well guess she will always stay in denialville ,denialing that

all she did was offer her house to us to live in ,

but she knows we gave up our house for her

we felted sorry for her she just lost her husband and she begged

us to help her out with bills she couldnt cover

we did what was right i have falt in the things i did to get back at her

and for that iam really sorry i added to i'll get you

back childesh game i really am sorry for the things

ive done to her . but life will go on and she will

never see aspassed all her seeing her self as a sant.

i just dont under stand her . i would like to ask her forgiveness

but i dont dare to open that box  till shes ready

 I do think shes thinking about whats shes put usthrew

 she keeps wanting me to come over and set and vist with her

all day but I iam not ready I am honest with

myself to say it may never happen. but i do know one thing

shes dammaged a realtsionship that really could have been so much more

than what it is now empty . but I wont let myself be hurt again by her

is it iam bitter ? no becakse i dont hate her i would have every

right to but i chose not to hate her i just say away from her

for my health sake. that is the best i can do for me . noone

will look out for my health but me ,becalse no one was looking out

for my health and it cost me a stroke . so if iam self fish so be it.